But where do you get your protein?
Guys, I don't mean to show off, but I can do seven push-ups.
I have been sculpting these pistols of mine ever since the series of Friends where Jennifer Aniston had really long hair and the most exquisite, toned, tanned bicep-zone I ever did see. I had gun goals circa 2000, before #goals was even a thing. These guns don't build themselves. They need to be built, by continuous push-uppery and skull crushery and yoga and handstands.
Here's my sister and me forcing our friend Emma into a plank-off at a party. It's okay, Emma likes us. In fact this may even have been her idea. My sister won, which was annoying.
When I first went plant powered, I heard that vegans are often asked "where do you get your protein?" It's true! It's one of the questions I'm most thrown. No-one cares where you get your protein until you threaten to take away their beef.
My husband thinks it would be good to memorize the following. They say: "Where do you get your protein? And I say:
"Well Clive, recommendations vary but most active adults need 0.8 grams of protein per kilogram of body weight per day. I weigh about 62 kilos so I need about 49.6 grams of protein a day. Of course, women need a bit less and elite athletes need more, but that's the ballpark. I get my protein - and thanks again for asking and taking such an interest in my diet, Clive - from a range of plant based ingredients, such as soy, hemp, quinoa and beans, but I top it up, on account of my athleticism, with protein powder. And where do you get yours?"
Which I would LOVE to retort when asked, but words fail me. I just say "Um, nuts and stuff" and wish that I could answer questions as quickly and proficiently as Google, which gave 8,790,000 results in 0.48 seconds when I asked it that question.
The nice people at Protein World recently sent me their vegan protein powder to try, in vanilla and chocolate flavour.
Some protein powder tastes yuk but I'm happy to report these guys have nailed it. The chocolate one was especially yummy and my guns have been popping out of my sleeve like Popeye ever since I started glugging it. He of husband fame remarked that I was looking decidedly trim the other day, a compliment for which I can assure you he was rewarded.
These shakes can even suffice as a meal replacement if you mix it with nut milk instead of water and going by the lengthy list of vitamins on the label, doing so would have you hitting your RDAs in more fields than a slice of toast could ever dream to.
Before I was vegan I never considered what whey protein actually was as I guzzled it down my gullet. But obvs it's dairy and dairy is gross. I follow a few vegan weight lifters on Instagram for fitness-inspo and my god their guns are impressive without the need for whey or chicken meat. And if you can look like that without eating chooks, then why eat chooks? Athletes across multitude disciplines are pursuing vegan lifestyles now - hello Lewis Hamilton. Hello Nate Diaz . Hello Serena and Venus Williams. Hello Rich Roll - just the fittest vegan ON THE PLANET. And I think it's okay to call Thor an athlete. I certainly wouldn't kick a Hemsworth off the start line of my races.
I'm supposed to be writing about protein powder. You can see how quickly I derail toward a Hemsworth while thinking about muscles.
Buy Protein World shakes here. See you at gun club.